Catch Up

So much has gone on since Resurrection Day.
 Jess and I both hit the Fabulous 40 mark and crazy thing is over half that time him and I have been together, actually next month will be 20 years married... Yup, I know... I'm one lucky lady, married to my best friend and. partner.
We celebrated mothers day, I was awakened by my girls with poppers (yup, i know fireworks?? ... ya just got to know how silly our family is)

 My girls made me home made gifts (always the best) And my granddaughter made me awesome sign.

 My mom came over for an awesome lunch that my hubby, son, son in law and brother in law made and served for us ladies (I didn't even have to wash one dish all day, actually Jesse started Mothers Day a day early and made me ceviche the day before, did I mention how lucky of a lady I am?) My sister and brother in law came along with their kids, it was to bring us the Sea Doo we were going to borrow for the next day, but we made a day of BBQ and fun with them.

We celebrated Jesse's birthday with a family camping trip, David even came ( he hasn't been on a trip with us since before he left to boot camp over 3 years ago yup, I know how time flies. It was such a fun time, Annabel brought her best friend and Cinda brought her mini family and our adopted daughter Myra. 

This was also the first time Isabel was able to join us. We lucked out that I reserved our favorite spot. We set up the volleyball net and the men had a bean bag toss competition and of course David and Steven were upset because they couldn't beat my Hubby... Hahaha the competitiveness with these guys is hilarious. As usual we ate and ate and ate. I'm looking forward to our next trip, the kids are already asking when it's gonna be.
Another exciting note and one proud momma here, is Cinda is going to college and her professor see the potential Cinda has and got her a job at the 24 hour animal hospital. It's such a blessing to know where Cinda was a year ago to whee she is today and doing what she has wanted to do since she was a little girl.
On another exciting note my sister will be here in two week and I am counting down the days.. We have a trip to Legoland and San diego planned. Ohh not to mention the reason she is coming, my brother is getting married. And another great note, we didn't think my brother in law was going to get to come with her (he is Navy) but we find out on Tuesday if he just might be able!  
On another sad note, my mom said she was going back to Florida, it makes me sad but with her job ending in June she is ready for a change and is excited to go back to the church in Jacksonville. I know my mom and if she says she's going, then she is going. I know God will bless her in whatever she seeks (hopefully a Godly Husband, hee hee hee .. yup, i know.. i'm bad)
As for us we are still dealing where God wants us at this time, we haven't stopped seeking him, honestly on a little detour, I was talking to a sister in our fellowship this week and I was honest and told her my heart has hardened towards people, and she said these words to me on my birthday yesterday : 
"I've looked up to you for many reasons, your faith, your righteousness, you telling me a ling time ago don't ever settle for anything but the best for your kids and marriage. Sometimes during my storms your words and advice calmed and helped me get through those dark days" 
Her words that she says I said  helped her...have truly showed me the family of God we serve is so Faithful to put the people and words we need at the right moment.
Have an awesome week!!!  

PROVERBS 17:17
A friend loves at all times, And a brother is born for adversity.

Memorial Day

Today is Memorial Day, a day to remember those who have fought for the freedoms most of our county takes for granted. I for one am truly thankful for all the sacrifices done by our soldiers and I can proudly say my Son and first born is one of the soldiers doing just that. Have a blessed day!

Resurrection.....Day

So it's Easter Sunday already and time has flown by this year it seems like. I've been on my usual teeter totter of emotions. I have been dealing a lot with my hubby's physical illness's first he was diagnosed with shingles and stayed home for some days. I knew something was wrong when he said he was in pain. See my hubby is the backbone of our family and has a high tolerance for pain, so when he complains even just a little "momma bear" gets worried. Then he went on to get a bump on his head removed thinking it was a cyst only to find out it was a tumor. There goes a couple more days home and more worrying. We just received word on Thursday when they removed the stitches that it was not malignant!!!  Thank God for all his promises and faithfulness even when we fall short and are wandering.
We decided to start spring off with a family camping trip and invited Jesse's brother's family and my daughter & son in law. It was three days of sun, food, jet skiing, volleyball, food, bean bag game (new awesome game Jess found) and did I mention food??? As usual I overdid it on the sun the first day that I was dying by the second day. I'll never learn (yup, I know... I'm told every summer). Athena got to go on her first ride on the seadoo, she is gonna be our water baby.

After a week of busy work for me and Jesse having a slow week it was another weekend of family. My niece turned one and we headed south for the festivities.

 Leaving early to prepare for our Easter festivities only to get a shocking phone call from family in New Mexico that go to the same fellowship as us. They informed us their pastor answered the call again to pioneer 4 states away. My cousin wa hurt, excited and in shock it was just Announced at their annual conference in El Paso. Even with all the shock he said something that helped resurrect my heart. He said that he learned from him and is sad to see him go "but he is not serving man but GOD" I know that in my heart but in life it's so hard. Its crazy because before all this I have been praying with a friend from work and crazily getting discrenmanship on what God is dealing with her with. Once again God is amazing even when we fall short. I feel like, should I even be praying with you if my heart is hardened at times??? Then we had some people from church over to tell us we needed to do what God wanted us to do...once again easier said than done.. but that night again another confirmation. A guy Jesse prayed for 2 years ago called him out of the blue (not knowing our situation) and asked for prayer and just someone to talk to... Again.. I know we need to do what God wants us to do. You want to trust and get that direction your yearning for.. But I know it's back to the basics and trusting Gods word. We went to church this morning and the children's church put on a cute puppet show. But even during the song service in the beginning of the service God was nudging me on some areas that I'm   struggling with but am being down right prideful and rebellious in (yup, I know my honesty can be a bit much) so during the alter call I told my hubby "we need to go up and get this prayer and direction going, because being in the desert we are gonna die before 40 years.. Hahaha (we both turn 40 next month) But I meant it as the isrealites wandering for 40 years... (yup, I know I'm too much) But I know God heard my prayers and is working... I'm ready for the move!!! Happy Resurrection Day!!!

1 Corinthians 15  

Moreover, brethren, I declare to you the gospel which I preached to you, which also you received and in which you stand, by which also you are saved, if you hold fast that word which I preached to you—unless you believed in vain. For I delivered to you first of all that which I also received: that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures

Fearing the Unknow.....

So this last week was a big eye opener for me and the love I have for God, my Hubby and Kids (including grand baby girl). It never fails to amaze me how awesome our God is. My son was going through some serious things at work and needed some help which his awesome sister and her  husband were able to help him with and I did some of the footwork, through that experience he knew he had to surrender to God with his things.. which just so happen to be perfect timing since Dennis Wright was in 29 Palms for a Revival. He is and evangelist and the father of the pastor that just left 29 and went to be a missionary Samoa America, the new pastor in 29 has really been following up on David and taking him out to lunch and just getting to know him. Its an awesome thing to know we are in a fellowship of  Men & Women that have a desire for souls and to help them in their walk. I just love how our God is sooo faithful even when we fall short or during a time of being stagnate. 
Also during the week we had a brother from the church over for dinner. It was nice to get back to the first love Jess and I have and that's fellow shipping with people. Jesse and I honestly believe that is a gift we have, people skills, something we know we need if we ever get the opportunity to do Gods will and venture out to be pastors. We have a long way to go, but know what we need to do... and that's what the brother was encouraging us to do also. Yup, I know... fearing the unknown... leaving everything your comfortable with to do something that their is no guarantee of and that's what the world tells us.. make sure you have a back up plan, 401K, retirement... But God tells us trust him and he will supply our needs according to his grace and mercy.
Okay soooo now back to some more fear, after coming back from CIF.. Jesse was complaining about a pain.. that is sooo unlike him, the guy has a super high tolerance for pain. So for him to complain, I got a little worried. The next day the area he was complaining about was not looking so good and he said he would hold off another day, by the end of the day he couldn't tolerate the pain anymore and went to the Drs, after showing his boss that morning.. his boss immediately knew what it was and sure enough the doctor gave him the same diagnosis.. he got on pain meds and some sort of antibiotic. I called my mom and told her what it was.. .she was like ohh no.. call your aunt she had it, and was bed ridden for a month. I did and after talking to her I felt a little better and nervous both at the same time.. See Jesse continued to work until Friday, when he finally stood home. I had him, Annabel (sick with the flu) and Athena all at the house. Its not like Jess to take naps and just be unfortable, it was really starting to worry, me..... the unknow... the security... he started talking about life insurance and other crazy things. It  brought a crazy reality to me... I could not imagine my life without him. I have know and been with this man for over half my life and we have sooo much more life to live TOGETHER (God willing) 

Yup, I know.. thats some crazy things to think about, depressing.... But we have to always remember our life is not our own.... we are on borrowed time and I am ever so grateful for the Man God gave me in this life. Jess is back at work today feeling better, he should be getting his minor surgery next week so keep him in your prayers. Have an awesome week!!!!

 Proverbs 9:10

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, And the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.

Wrestling, Valentines & Life

We are coming up to a quick end to Wrestling Season. This is one of the most stressful emotional anxiety attack time for me, and I'm not even the one wrestling, This last weekend we were in Santa Maria for the CIF Qualifications.. .See all season comes up to this moment, so top 8 girls at this tournament qualified for CIF, then top 8 at CIF head to STATE. Annabel my youngest, is following in her big brother and sisters footsteps. I have never seen her so determined and focused. 

Well we went to CIF Finalists, and my Belly was one win away from heading to State, she lost that match without crying (Yup, I know...holding it in) She came home from having a team dinner  went straight to her dad's arms in tears.. it broke me. I still tear up. I know how hard she worked and wanted this. But she is only a sophmore and 28 of the girls in her 32 man bracket were seniors. She made it to day two and put in some serious work. She knows we are proud of her win or lose. She knows she is better that she was last year and will only improve. 

The awesome part of going to CIF Finalist is it was held in Eastvale, Ca. Jesse's sister lives there and opened her home up to 7 wrestling girls, 2 coaches, 2 wrestling moms and me & Jesse of course. She was such a blessing. Jesse and I showed up 2 hours before the team, his mom & sister cooked for everyone (not realizing wrestlers can't eat before the day of a big tournament, due to needing to make weight) that made Jess happy of course since his mommy made his favorite spaghetti (yup I know... spoiled baby, hmmm i do the same for my baby david...hee hee). After the first day of wrestling we left after Annabel's last match to head back to jesse's sisters house to BBQ some Chicken, salad, rice for the girls. David showed up and two of his old wrestling buddies from the high school drove down to cheer on our wrestling family (his sister opened her home up again) My dad showed up too.. That was soo awesome to see him go and encourage the girls after a loss.. reminding them to love the game, win or lose. 
The tournanments last day was on Valentines, and by the last match I was exhausted (and i didn't even wrestle) I ended up catching the flu, by day one.. I was living off Orange Juice and Dayquil. I felt like my head was going to explode. We came straight home and my loving hubby went and bought me some caldo de pollo (chicken stew), orange juice and nyquil.. i was out by 7 pm and didn't get up till almost 10 am then next morning. Nice Valentines huh...That night around midnight I heard  him praying, laying hands on me. I was a little groggy, but the prayers he prayed touched me. I know he is seeking Gods guidance with some questions he has. He has been getting council from a pastor/friend that he has. I just know that without God and a Vision we will perish.. I know for the both of us we can't go back to our old selves and trying so hard not to, the bible talks about becoming 7 times worse.. or being like a dog returning to his vomit. Those scriptures scare me. We have a lot of work and prayer ahead of us as to the direction we need to go, but I am trusting my God, Husband and the prayers from people that I know have been praying for us.

Isaiah 29:14

 Therefore, behold, I will again do a marvelous work Among this people, A marvelous work and a wonder; For the wisdom of their wise men shall perish, And the understanding of their prudent men shall be hidden.”

Christmas Tree Fiasco

Every year during Thanksgiving weekend we get our Christmas Tree, its been like that since jesse and I have been together. This Thanksgiving weekend came and left so fast this year and no tree, we were sooo busy with Family and guests this year (David brought home a Marine buddy that wasn't able to go home for the holidays so we opened our  home up to him) He stayed all the way through Sunday. He even went to Anaheim with us to see Annabel wrestle at the first tournament for the season. She came in 3rd only losing to a girl that is ranked 4th in State. She is focused for this year and I'm excited to see how far she will go.

Okay, getting back to my Christmas Tree Story, Jesse left the Friday after Thanksgiving Weekend to Phoenix for a Men's Rally in our fellowship, meaning another weekend without a Tree. Ohhh No.. I needed that tree in my home. So Friday when Annabel got out of school I decided we would do it. We ended up at Cheesecake Factory for a nice dinner, then walked around the Oaks, (we had to walk off the Gluttony of a meal we had just endured) Leaving the Oaks, we both complained how tired we were and it was dark already, but we trudged on, getting 2 cups of coffee to spark up our passion to get the tree. Many of you know me and Belly are vertically challenged and our suburban is pretty high up (Yup, I know.. .I have to jump to get inside the driver seat, and have the seat pulled all the way forward to drive) Well we finally arrived at Home Depot and Belly was like "mom, how are we going to get that tree on the suburban" Ohh Ye of Little Faith!!! The Awesome worker at Home Depot Put it on top of it for us and even tied it down, of course Bell was watching the mirror the whole time making sure the tree didn't go flying off. When we finally got home we were stratergizing how we were going to get it off the roof of the SUV.. Annabel climbed on one side and me on the other, I wish I had someone taking pictures of this. When we finally off the car and took it upstairs, got it in the tree stand (only 2 hours to try to stand up in the stand without falling over). Here is the finishing tree... None of the ornaments match and the kids ornaments from elementary school are on it... See I am OCD remember and the oranments are supposed to match and be set on a theme, but with my age (and knowing Athena will be making me ornaments soon) I figured I would let Annabel go at it this year, so when Athena wants to, the kids can't complain. (shhhhhh... yup, I know not fair)

Sooo there you go... Wait.. no Fiasco in that story.. well i'm not done. Bell and I finally went to sleep, since she had to wrestle and be in Oxnard at 10 am the next morning, so while I was in a deep sleep I heard the loudest CRASH ever at 6 in the morning. I thought the building got hit or a train crashed across the street, but in an instant.. I remembered I put up the tree the day before. So I jumped out of bed and ran to the living room, my instincts were correct, my wonderful tree was on its side water all over the gifts and just lying there pitiful. I instantly texted jesse ( WE ARE GETTING A FAKE TREE NEXT YEAR & YOUR NEVER ALLOWED TO LEAVE THE STATE DURING THIS TIME OF YEAR EVER AGAIN).He laughed at me and called me, I could hear the guys in the background making fun of me. Ohhh talk about getting my adrenaline up and not being to go back to sleep. Annabel and I had to get a ladder to hold the tree up till Jesse got home that night. It was the most depressing looking tree ever. Well we got our tree up and ornaments back on, gifts re-wrapped (yup, i know.. they all got wet) But its gonna be a good Christmas, I got all my children coming home and my Mom. Have an awesome rest of the week!!!

Matthew 8:26
“Why are you fearful, O you of little faith?”

L.L.S. - LOVE, LEAD, SHARPEN

So many things that are so out of the norm have happened in the last two weeks. My heart breaks over alot of it. Is it self inflicted or just people? People always say your weak if your a Christian, but I beg to differ, being a Christian has been one of the toughest challenges to me (besides being a mom) See if your like everyone else in the world, something goes wrong or you don't like it, you can easily make a phone call cuss someone out and go have a drink, and who cares if you were in the right or in the wrong (yup, I know... I was cussed out this week), funny thing is it was done over voicemail, I just seen I missed a call but there was no message there, so I called this person back, had to calm the situation (without getting my emotions involved, which is such a hard thing for me, ask anyone that knows me) But I could hear Jess in my head saying, keep your cool cuz this can escalate, needless to say I got the person calm and hope it is situated, only time will tell, considering I thought it was taken care of last week. Anyways, that leads to how awesome God is, because had I heard that message of her cussing me out before I called would I had reacted differently... me knowing me.. For Sure... I would of manifested and been called legion in that one phone call HA HA HA (yup, I know.. i'm a nut) I have to sit and laugh at this because if I don't I can grow bitter, and that bitterness can grow into something nasty, something I want no part in.
This whole situation that started up last week got me and Jess talking about some serious things, and I had to tell him how much I just need his Love and for him to Lead... with those two things.. he begins to Sharpen me.. help to build me (with God's help of course) into the Woman, Wife, Friend, Mother, that God Wants me to be. I have such a hard time saying yes to God, no comes out sooo much easier (yup, I know... to personal) but you know what, these entries help me vent out in a way, so that nasty bitterness doesn't creep in. Its like just lately we both find ourselves fighting something... its like we get to this certain point in our walk and don't know how to get that breakthrough. Jesse went to Phoenix for a mens rally with our fellowship for 2 days and came back excited for what he heard, and knew what he needed to do.. Well the day after he got home, i have a breakdown.... i knew i needed a breakthrough.. lucky for me he bought the DVD's and put one on about addiction (don't worry i'm not an alcholic or on drugs) but addiction is a type of idolotry .. anything you put before God.. and my addiction can be my bad temper or negativity.. Let me tell you 5 minutes into the DVD, I was like Shut it Off.. i'll repent already.. LOL. I finished the video and thanked my hubby for once again loving me enough to lead me to the sharpening knife and putting me under for a quick heart surgery. Even after the heart surgery, Jesse still felt uneasy, called a brother in another state about some stuff... maybe to whine who knows but the brothers response was "how do you now all these things, God isn't orchestrating to deal with some things you and Delilah need to deal with, for something greater that is to come" HMMMMM??? Can you say we both had to repent AGAIN... I love this fellowship and the men & women in it, when we are going through the fire, I know we can call someone and get some good Godly advice and its not biased but based off the word of God.
Sorry if this entry was a heavy reavy... next entry will be lighter as I tell you about my Christmas Tree Fiasco.. hahaha

PROVERBS 27:17 

As iron sharpens iron, So a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.