Letting Go

Wow, it’s been a while since I have even thought about getting on to write. The last couple of weeks have been sleepless, stressed out, bringing on an ulcer, kinda days. I have been preparing for a big federal inspection at work. I’ve had nightmares, knots in my back, easily irritated, mini tantrums and throwing in the towel kinda attitude. All the while my husband, girls and mom have been so supportive. I am blessed to get prayers on a daily basis from them, even when I don’t want them. Yup, I know.. “don’t want them” Yeah.. there is just some things I feel like I can do on my own, all the while knowing God is in control, no matter how hard I prepare, he knows the outcome beforehand. Me knowing this I still let it affect me.

Last night I was throwing a pity party after church, wanting to just crawl under a rock and whine all alone. Then low and behold my youngest yells for her dad…”are you ready to pray for mom” She lays hands on me, not like a pat but “LAYS HANDS ON” as if she if she is gonna be able to pull the Negative Nancy Demon out of me (my new nickname “Negative Nancy” since this whole ordeal began). Her dad all the while just smiling under his mustache. As they were praying I was thinking on the illustration Jesse was talking about while taking the offering during that evenings service. "Having your back." He knows I always have his back, just like Jonathan did with his armor bearer. I am soo thankful, they too have my back. I guess it takes us to take a moment to look around and see who is really there for you. For me, it’s God, my husband, and kids. I need to stop trying to be in control and let go, Yup, I know!

Well its a new week, my inspection is over. It is what it is, no matter the outcome, God is in control.

Galatians 6:9

And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.