3 A's

So last month I started seeing a Dr for some things that have been boggling me.... Its not an easy subject to talk about without tears coming to my eyes... but I'm dealing with some crazy anxiety..... That's the first "A" Its like a crazy fear that overcomes me, I cant sleep.. my mind wanders, am I going crazy, I just want to run away...... then the 2nd "A" comes along with that ... Anger..... I get mad at the littlest things, start the blame game with my other half.. while all the while he is waiting for me to get better, but I feel like I'm in this ditch that I cant climb out of, like the mud slide comes pouring down as I begin to ascend up. The Dr. gave me a prescription and that was the first thing I said to myself before I went to see her was I wasn't going to do anything they prescribed (I still have the prescription on my dresser mirror) Yup, I know stubborn... She's a licensed Dr, she wouldn't give me anything that would be bad for me.. but do I want to become addicted to another crazy thing in my life, I am prone to my addictive personality.. its either Go all the Way ... or Don't Go at All.... or at least that's what my hubby says i'm like.. there is no Gray area with me.. and that can be awfully scary. Well during this whole ordeal... I started my silent prayer to God... (he was like "hey its been awhile") I need to find a better Dr... and I know that God can bring me through this... and that's where the 3rd and final "A" comes.. ACCEPTANCE.... I have to accept HIM... and know he is going to get me through this.. no Dr. in the world can cure the pain in my heart (self inflicted at times... yup i know a heavy reavy....) but its time I come back to writing and come back to where HE wants me. 

1 Timothy 1:15

Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst.